Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Are you going to get some on this date?

Free hugs, but what about sex?
Yes or No?
Valentines Day is only about 3 weeks away. Shoes did it for me last year, and the Cry Baby was fun two years ago.

This year, I may just go on a date.

So you managed to get a date? But you are not a lady killer like myself? And you are just wondering whether or not the date is going to lead to you having sex?

Well, Holy Taco has created a very handy flowchart "Are You Going to Have Sex on This Date?" to help you determine whether or not your going to have sex at the end of your date. Try it out!

Will those days soon be gone?

Friday, January 21, 2011

Meet Sue - the Kenyan prostitute building a brand

When Sex is No Longer Sin
I just came across a blog supposedly written by Sue, a prostitute working on Koinange Street: Nairobi Nights. It has well-written and entertaining stories about a working girl in Nairobi. The stories are well written and quite entertaining.
"My name is Sue. I practice along Koinange Street, Nairobi. These are thoughts, observations and experiences from my prostitution world. Nothing of the soft, sympathy seeking topsy turvy kind. But straight talk, hard facts and real anecdotes. They are worth something."
The sexy 'girl' has already written 10 episodes so far, including blog posts with exciting titles such as "The Spiritual Role Of A Prostitute", "When Sex Is No Longer Sin", "Let The Pee Flow", "Why Should I Not Open My Legs?" and "I can't Feel Your Thing".

In her latest post, she refers to one of her teachers in high school who came up with an interesting metaphor, comparing a girl to a tin of cocoa:
"A female teacher in the mixed boarding school that I attended used to compare us girls to a tin of cocoa; you remember the one which had a foil inside. "The first time you let a man touch your breasts or private parts, then you have opened the lid. The moment you lose your virginity, the foil is gone. After that, every time you have sex, the cocoa gets depleted. If you are not careful the rightful owner will find there is nothing left for him". At the face of it, it was a polite way to dissuade us from adolescence sex, but a little deeper it implied we girls didn't really belong to ourselves but to some man somewhere, who was supposed to have all the cocoa. Our role in society it seemed was to prepare for this man."
And in another recent post, Sue writes:
"Our value decreases as your experience increases. Quoting five years experience is a turn off. Many a girl gets to prostitution telling themselves they wont do it for more than a few months, maybe six, save some money, start a business , hit it big in some way or get a 'proper' job. But a year goes and another still on the street. The optimal experience is about a year; when one is no longer surprised by the antics of men and all the inhibitions are gone. After a year there is a plateau and then the downward curve starts."
What do you think of this new Kenyan blog? Is it written by a 'ghost writer'? Is it polluting our blogging landscape? Or is it a nice addition to the scene?

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

The IDEOS has landed!

Huawei IDEOS
posing with a model
The much anticipated Huawei IDEOS U8150 phone has been launched in Kenya.

The IDEOS was announced last September by Huawei as a low cost handset that the Chinese manufacturer had worked on in collaboration with Google. Depicted as a low end smartphone, the IDEOS is anticipated to be a game changer, all at a reasonable price.

The phone comes with Android 2.2, a 2.8 inch colour touch screen, 3G HSDPA up to 7.2 Mbps, a 3.2 Mp camera, WI-FI and Bluetooth. The phone retails at Ksh 8,499/- and is bundled with Ksh 1,000/- airtime plus 600 Mb of data. This means a US$100 smartphone has finally arrived! This is exactly the right move in bringing Android to the masses in Kenya.

It's the best cheap phone currently available and it runs on Android, so the question is not really whether you will buy the IDEOS (of course you will), but which one you will buy. Which one? Yes, which one! This thing comes in different colors, so you will have to decide on the color. The phone comes in four different colors: black, blue, purple and yellow.

The Huawei IDEOS U8150 phone is available in black, blue, purple and yellow

The science of color psychology may help us in deciding which color of IDEOS to buy:

Black: Black is often used as a symbol of menace or evil, but it is also popular as an indicator of authority and power. It is used to represent treacherous characters and is often associated with witchcraft, hence ideal for Kamba people. Black is also associated with death and mourning, unhappiness, sexuality, formality, and sophistication.

Blue: Blue calls to mind feelings of calmness or serenity. It is often described as peaceful, tranquil, secure, and orderly. Blue can also create feelings of sadness or aloofness. Blue can also lower the pulse rate and body temperature.

Purple: Purple is the symbol of royalty and wealth. Purple also represents wisdom and spirituality. Purple can sometimes appear exotic or artificial.

Yellow: Yellow shines with optimism, enlightenment, and happiness. Yellow can also create feelings of frustration and anger. Yellow can also increase the metabolism.

Yellow for my main girlfriend
How do these colors make you feel? You may have realized by now that this will not be an easy decision. So I will just buy all four of them. I will buy a yellow one for my main girlfriend, so that she remains optimistic and happy. I will buy a blue one for my clande in order to lower her body temperature, she sometimes just gets waaaaaaay too hot. I will buy a purple IDEOS for my sugar mummy because she is wealthy, wise and artificial. And a black one for myself of course, because of my sexuality and sophistication. And you? Which color will you buy?